if

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Chandler: Uh, if I were omnipotent for a day, I'd...make myself omnipotent forever.
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Chandler: Uh, if I were omnipotent for a day, I'd...make myself omnipotent forever. 呃,如果我有一天无所不能,我要……永远都无所不能。

Phoebe: Okay, okay. If I were omnipotent for a day, I would want, um, world peace, no more hunger, good things for the rain forest. And bigger boobs.
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Phoebe: Okay, okay. If I were omnipotent for a day, I would want, um, world peace, no more hunger, good things for the rain forest. And bigger boobs. 好的。如果我有一天变得无所不能,我希望,恩,世界和平,没有饥荒,热带雨林受到更好保护……还要大咪?咪!(注释:omnipotent:无所不能的。)

Phoebe: If you never smoke again , I'll give you seven thousand dollars!
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Phoebe: If you never smoke again , I'll give you seven thousand dollars! 如果你不再抽烟,我就给你七千美元!

Chandler: If I had a sock on my hand for thirty years it'd be talking too.
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Chandler: If I had a sock on my hand for thirty years it'd be talking too. 如果我有只袜子在手上戴了三十年,它也会开始说话了。

Ross: If only he were a woman.
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Ross: If only he were a woman. 如果他是个女人,那该有多好。

Paula: Honey. . you should always feel the thing. Listen, if that's how you feel about the guy, Monica, dump him!
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Paula: Honey. . you should always feel the thing. Listen, if that's how you feel about the guy, Monica, dump him! 亲爱的,应该有感觉才行。听着,如果你对那个男人只有这种感觉,莫妮卡,甩了他。

Paula: Well, you do realize the odds of that happening are a little slimmer if they never get to meet the guy.
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Paula: Well, you do realize the odds of that happening are a little slimmer if they never get to meet the guy. 你确定知道这种事情发生的机会会更渺茫的…… 如果他们根本就没见过这小伙。(odds:机会。)

Monica: I know. I know. Mind if I whimper a little bit?
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Monica: I know. I know. Mind if I whimper a little bit? 我知道,我知道。能让我小声的哭一下吗?

Phoebe: Even if I was happy and skipping, I'd hear: "Not not mine. Not not mine."
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Phoebe: Even if I was happy and skipping, I'd hear: "Not not mine. Not not mine." 即使我很快乐边走边跳,都会听到“不是我的,不是我的”。

Phoebe: It's not mine. I didn't earn it. If I kept it, it would be like stealing.
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Phoebe: It's not mine. I didn't earn it. If I kept it, it would be like stealing. 这些钱不是我的,不是我赚来的,如果我留着,那就像是偷来的。